i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
