how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Randomize
