Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
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