you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Randomize
