he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Randomize
