i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Randomize
