Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
