Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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