Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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