I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
