At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize