this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
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