dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize
