i don't like sucking hair
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Randomize
