I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
