new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
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