so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
