I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
