I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Banned from zoo.
Again?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
