That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
