if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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