Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
