Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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