Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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