First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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