just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Randomize
