She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
