soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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