He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
