I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
