i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
