he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
