its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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