only if we run a train.
done.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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