Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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