so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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