We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
