My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
