Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
