my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
