Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Randomize
