And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
you had me at cake vodka
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize