how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
did i walk over a car last night?
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
