they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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