I want to make a zoo with you.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
