so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
