How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Randomize
