Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
