I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Randomize
