she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
