I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize
